Queens Podcast is obsessed with a good ghost story (as you can tell, if you read the first part of this series). And we really love these stories when the ghost in question has a fuckin’ axe to grind. Like, I am so petty that I’m comin’ at you from the afterlife. We. Are. Here. For. It.
So, join us in the second part of a spooky series we’re calling Spiteful Spirits!
Empress Wu Haunted by Former Rivals
If you’re newer to our show, there’s a chance you’re not familiar with Empress Wu. That’s okay, we’ll recap.
Wu Zetian was a concubine turned ruler of China. And on her climb to the top she had to do some pretty ruthless shit. Or should we say… wuthless? (We probably shouldn’t, but we do)
So, yeah. She made a couple of enemies. Namely, the former empress, Empress Wang, and a fellow concubine named Consort Xiao. It’s said that Wu quite possibly framed these women of infanticide and then had their “arms and legs cut off and their truncated bodies thrown into wine vats”. HOLY SHIT, WHAT?
Okay, so the whole bleeding out into wine decanters is probably more legend than fact, but still. Shit, y’all. I was not ready for that. However they died (probably strangulation) Wu was certainly responsible. Her oh, so pissed off predecessor, Empress Wang, warned something along the lines of…
“I hope to be reincarnated as a cat and she reincarnated as a mouse. That way I can grab at her throat forever and ever.”
So, yeah… You can say she went to her grave with some unfinished business.
But that might not have been the end of it. Why, you ask? Oh, because the pissed off ghosts of Empress Wang and Consort Xiao haunted her there for the rest of her life. They mainly tormented her at the capital palace, the scene of the crime, but were known to follow her to a few other royal residences, too.
She had several priests exorcise a couple of palaces but to no avail. For the rest of her life, these two spiteful spirits showed themselves to her, bloody and disheveled, just to remind her of the price they paid for her to gain power.
Oh, and Wu also never allowed cats to be kept in any of the palaces. Just… in case.
Lady Mary Berkeley, A Jilted Wife
Chillingham Castle is said to possibly be the most haunted castle in all of Britain. Located in the north of England, it has been the place of many a ghost hunt.
But who is the spiteful spirit we’re here to discuss? Lady Mary Berkeley (aka: #poorBabyMary) has been supposedly haunting the halls of Britain’s most haunted since the early 18th century in the hopes of finding her faithless husband.
Towards the end of the 1600’s, Poor Baby Mary married some fucking fuck boy.
It’s likely that she didn’t have much say in the marriage (because history is a bag of dicks), but the couple did have at least one daughter and Mary tried to be a good wife. But, she wasn’t given much of a chance because before Mary really even had time to settle into motherhood… her husband had left her. FOR HER SISTER.
Yeah, fuck that guy. And you know what? Fuck the sister, too. What a shitty thing to do. Y’all, believe me when I say that this was the fucking scandal of the century. Mary’s father pressed charges against Sir Fuck Boy and it became whatever the equivalent of a 17th century media circus is.
But poor baby Mary was mortified. She wandered the halls, cradling her baby, moaning, crying, SCREAMING for her husband to return to her and her daughter. He never did… so it’s said she continues to haunt the halls pleading for his return. (Girl, you can do better!)
John Wilson Was Framed… and He’s PISSED!
Y’all. This one is actually a ghost story inside of a ghost story. It’s also our first male spiteful spirit (Queens Podcast is an equal opportunity ghost story provider).
This haunting takes place at Sanquhar Castle in Scotland. The lord of the castle, Lord Robert, had like maybe… probably murdered his young mistress, a lady named Marion. Marion, by the way, may also haunt the castle and her body was also maybe found in the ruins of the castle in the 1900’s (roughly 400 years after her death).
Basically, Lord Robert’s contemporaries were like “hey, umm… this young woman has gone missing and everyone knows you were banging her so… We’re gonna investigate that” and long story short… his house servant John Wilson was pinned with the crime.
The real fucked up thing is that everyone knew Wilson didn’t commit the crime and that he was simply a scapegoat for men more powerful. To really make a shitty situation shittier, the courts decided to make an example of him and hand down the harshest punishment possible. The death penalty. Poor dude was hung to his death sometime in the early 1590’s.
Thinks that’s unfair? Yup. Know who else thinks it’s unfair? John fucking Wilson. In fact, he was so pissed off that he immediately started haunting the castle, shaking his chains and moaning for everyone to hear. As if to say “UUUUUUUGH WHAT THE FUCK“?
The castle has since fallen into despair. All that stands are the ruins of a once great castle. They are honestly, pretty creepy looking. Sanquhar castle still gets it’s fair share of visitors and tourists… who (you guessed it) often report hearing moaning and what can be described as the rattles of chains. Yup. All these years later, this guy is still having none of this.
Okay, y’all. I need a drink or two after learning about all these spooky bitches.
Do you have a spiteful spirit you’d like to see discussed in the next series? Let us know!
Sources:
Haunted Palaces Blog
The Red Brush: Writing Women of Imperial China